Tuesday Dinner... Farewell

[rowanf]

Back in the early 1990s, my friend Linnea decided she couldn't manage to do two subscription dinners a month. She asked me to take over Fourth Tuesday and I have been doing a monthly dinner party every since. It has been a wonderful and rewarding exercise. I have loved having my friends gather, new friends come in and meet the old, all in an atmosphere of hospitality and good cheer.

However, after 18 years or so I have been finding myself increasingly burnt out as each month rolls around and I have to plan, shop, prep and cook for 12-16 people. This month, because of our trip, I had declared that we were buying take-away pizza. Folks still signed right up.

You'd think that buying pizza would be stress-free. I thought so. But evidently I didn't do it right and someone chided me for not buying their pizza of choice. I spent two very unpleasant and stressful hours stewing about it and decided that this was the last straw. I just don't have the energy to coordinate a dinner party every single month.

So, last night was the last Fourth Tuesday dinner. It had a good run, going all the way back to when Linnea started them in 1978 or so. I have no desire to lose touch with my friends and I hope that things will work out. I'm really sad about it. But I needed to shed the stressor in my life and it is good that I did.

Comments

[malterre.livejournal.com]

I feel your pain. I ran a BBQ with my husband for 25 years. I told folks back in 2005
"I can run a renfaire or I can run a BBQ but I can't do both. Anyone who wants to take it over can do so."
*crickets*
someone chided me for not buying their pizza of choice.
Even Miss Manners would feel that was an ungrateful guest.

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

BBQ vs Faire. I admit Faire sounds like more fun (and more work!)

As someone who often comes off as brusque or rude, I am quite sure that she didn't mean to precipitate this whole thing. She was expressing her disappointment. It just hit me wrong.

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

Oh, and I must say that is a very, very fine icon. :-)

[mdlbear]

Here's the version I ganked from ravan

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

I'm seeing it with a dragon's flame. :-) Hmmm.

[jezebeltw.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry you had to let it go.

You have a lot on your plate (um), with, oh, gosh, I can't even list all the activities, responsibilities and obligations. You don't need the stress of buying pizza, dang it! :P

I admire your energy, Rowan. And the fact that you can say, "Enough is enough".

Love, Jenn

[memyslfni.livejournal.com]

OMGS - you have alot of patience. I would sooooo have done more than chide this compplainer. I would soooo have either showed them the door or left in huff myself. I know that Miss Manners would certaily have a better solution than that, but - dang!
and throwing a dinner party for that many each month - good gosh girl! I couldn't even get that done when I was 25.

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

If I hadn't been so burnt out already I'm sure the email from my friend wouldn't have hit me so hard. It isn't her fault really, just the last straw with so many others had piled under it.

And it was fun for a long time to do that dinner party. I like to cook and I really enjoy the table full of happy folks sharing good food and conversation.

[mr-kurt.livejournal.com]

As one of your attendees, thank you! It was a wonderful monthly event, and a delightful time. I was honored to be included, and even occasionally cook things for it.

Great community dinners like this are the stuff of legend, things people remember for many years after they have run their course. This one will certainly be that for me. I met wonderful folks, had great conversation, and generally enjoyed myself immensely.

For those not attending, the food was generally marvelous, yet inexpensive. (Except the time or two I cooked seafood lasagna, sadly.) The conversation was lively and playful, the wine varied, the company entertaining. Truly a magnificent event.

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Having you and your family join us has been a pleasure and a delight.

[pearlshadow.livejournal.com]

do what you need to do to take care of yourself..

the person who chided you was really showing bad manners as well as an ungrateful "attitude". shame on them.

love you and sends you big [[[hugs]]]

[rowanf.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the hug! I am feeling sad but it will pass. And, as I said above, I'm sure my friend didn't mean me to take her remark the way I did. Looking forward to seeing you sometime soon (and bringing by the new statues for the House :-) Depending on how fried I am after Beltaine Saturday maybe I'll drop by the At Home.

[pearlshadow.livejournal.com]

always glad to see your smilin face. dont stress yourself ok???

(kinda overwhelmed at the idea of new statues for the temple.. thank you...)

[jilara.livejournal.com]

It was always fun, back when I was coming to it, but I'm actually surprised you kept it up so long. Sometimes, one just has to clear away a tradition and take care of yourself. Thank you for having been such a great hostess and having us all over, over the years.